Every Kid in a Park

With spring right around the corner, we're hoping you and your families are finding the motivation to go outside and enjoy the great outdoors! For those of you with fourth-years, it's time to take advantage of Every Kid in a Park, which provides all fourth graders and their families an annual pass for free admission to the country's national parks, forests, monuments, and wildlife refuges! Find out more below. 

Yellowstone National Park: Wyoming

Every Kid in a Park is an initiative started by former President Barack Obama in 2015 to encourage children to visit US National Parks, public lands, and waters. There are so many important reasons to get your child involved in the great outdoors, including benefits for our children’s brains, their developing eye sight, their development of empathy, their sense of self, their emotional well-being, even their creativity.

Mese Verde National Park: Colorado

Petrified Forest National Park: Arizona

To get started, visit Every Kid in a Park with your fourth-year child, and engage in the interactive site. Afterwards, print out your free pass (which only requires your zip code, and go explore!

Yosemite National Park: California

For a small list of great hikes near St. Louis, be sure to check out this blog post from just last year. But with spring break right around the corner, be sure to check out some National Parks a bit farther away, and save some money while you're at it. After all, there are 59 National Parks in the United States!

Grand Canyon National Park: Arizona

Glacier National Park: Montana

Thank you to Lower Elementary Guide Anna Schwind for bringing Every Kid in a Park to our attention!

The Development of the Will: Movement in the 0-3-Year-Old Child

We have discussed the development of the will in the context of emerging self-discipline in the preschool and elementary-aged child, but a child begins exerting her will much earlier than this; in reality, a child begins developing her will as soon as she begins to move her hands, fingers, feet, toes, and head as an infant! To better understand this process, and the critical relationship between movement and intellect in the 0-3-year-old child, we spoke to our Parent-Child Montessori Guide, Cab Yau, below. "For babies and young children we talk about the the link between the development of the intellect, the will, and movement.  With freedom to move, the child is able to interact with the world and expand her intellect.  With the expansion of intellect - which for a young child is done almost exclusively if not entirely through interaction with the environment - the child is then able to begin to develop her will: her ability to choose.""How does he achieve this independence?  He does it by means of a continuous activity. How does he become free?  By means of constant effort. …we know that development results from activity.  The environment must be rich in motives which lend interest to activity and invite the child to conduct his own experiences." (Maria Montessori: The Absorbent Mind)"This is a not a linear process; all pieces are completely interactive and interdependent.  Without the freedom to move, the child is prohibited from both sensorial exploration (leading to development of the intellect) as well as development of the will.  Moreover, because very young children are actually learning to move (because that is fundamentally part of the intellect they are developing), we deprive them of both intellectual development as well as the development of their will by not allowing free movement.""We don't really think of the young child expressing her will, and in many ways she cannot express it the same way a second plane child can.  However, we can create an environment which allows the development of the will.  Free movement is the key to this.  In simpler terms, a child of this age cannot learn to control her movements until she learns to move!"“At birth, the child leaves a person – his mother’s womb – and this makes him independent of her bodily functions.  The baby is next endowed with an urge, or need, to face the out world and to absorb it.  We might say that he is born with ‘the psychology of world conquest.’   By absorbing what he finds about him, he forms his own personality.”  (Maria Montessori: The Absorbent Mind)"It is after this that the child, who can now walk and feels confident of his strength, begins to notice the actions of those about him, and tries to do the same things.  In this period he imitates not because someone has told him to do so, but because of a deep inner need which he feels." (Maria Montessori: The Absorbent Mind)"This kind of activity (climbing, carrying etc), which serves no external purpose, gives children the practice they need for co-ordinating their movements. ….all the child does is to obey an inner impulse." (Maria Montessori: The Absorbent Mind)Thank you, Cab, for the wise words, and thank you to all the parents present who agreed to allow us to document the Parent/Child course in action. If you are interested in learning more about the Parent/Child course offered here at Villa di Maria, please attend our Open House on Tuesday, March 13th from 9am to 11am in the main building.The next 8-week session is beginning soon! Starting the week of March 26th, classes for children ages 8 weeks to 2 years will be held on Tuesday and Friday mornings from 9am to 11am. For more information on the Parent/Child course offered here at Villa di Maria, please contact Carrie Tallon, Villa di Maria's Director of Education at carriet@villadimaria.org .

Moving our Bodies

Children (and adults) need to move their bodies, especially in the winter months when they are cooped up inside for longer than they would like to be. Physical exercise is crucial to healthy growth, in addition to helping our intellectual side through stimulating creativity and increasing concentration. Get a glimpse into one of VdM's Lower Elementary PE classes below. Coach Leo doesn't mess around! In addition to the physical exercise these children get during their daily recess, Mr. Leo provides structured exercise, like running laps, playing sports, and doing calisthenics, like the lunges across the field seen above and below!PE is also a place for learning and practicing good sportsmanship. Every PE class is full of cheering and encouraging words. Here, the boys cheered on the girls as they lunged across the field. When the next group went, the previous group cheered them on! The sense of community is heightened during these little acts of kindness.Plus, there is plenty of laughter. Leap-frogging human beings are funny.The one-legged hops across the field were harder than they looked. I know for a fact that more than one of these children woke up the next morning extra sore!Thank you, Coach Leo, for getting these kids moving!For more on why you should get outside in the winter weather, be sure to read this! And why kids need recess, here.

Parenting: On Sharing

Sharing is a tricky topic; oftentimes we, as parents, place high value on our children's ability to generously share their prized possessions during play dates and outings. But should we force our children to share? An unconventional view, below. First: the development piece. In order to share genuinely and truly from the heart, a child must be developmentally ready. Oftentimes (and much to the chagrin of parents) this means a toddler or young preschool-aged child is nowhere near being ready to share! This is difficult when we as parents want our children to be kind, generous, and aware of others' needs and desires. But sharing, like any other skill, takes time and practice to develop, and there are times when we should support our child's choice not to share.For the child in the First Plane of Development (in particular the first half of this plane: the 0-3 year age range), sharing is quite difficult. During ages 0-3, a child is in the stage of the unconscious being. An unconscious being is solely engaged in the construction of the self; he is learning who he is in relation to his environment, and thus not yet able to take into consideration other people's thoughts and feelings.Once a child is in the 3-6 age range, he begins to develop the ability to share. However, this is a time for teaching, not forcing. A child who is forced to share and constantly managed by an adult will often develop the idea that he is not in charge of his things, and may begin hoarding them in order to avoid them being taken away. This, obviously, is undesirable behavior.Children develop a strong sense of fairness as they grow older. In effect, being forced to share can be translated to them as others can take what they want from me, but I may not take from them. This, obviously, does not seem fair, and goes against their understanding of the term. Imagine if someone walked up to you today and demanded your car keys, stating that he would like to share your car for a few hours? Then imagine that someone else stepped in after you said "No, sorry, I'd like to use my car today" and took your car keys from your hands, handed them to the other person, turned to you, and said, "We need to share with others, you know."  How infuriating would that be?! How unfair is this scenario? It is the same feeling for a child when he is forced to share.Aside from these reasons, there is another important perspective worth taking. Do we want our children to believe that if they want something that someone else has, they have a right to walk up and take it from them simply because they want it? This is not representative of how the grown up world works, so shouldn't we prepare a child for the reality that there will be plenty of times he will not get what he wants?And yet, of course, we want to encourage our children to share, on their terms, and for the right reasons. Below, some tips on how to encourage your young child to share, without forcing him or her to do so.Encourage a mindset of giving.Make giving a priority in your child's life both by demonstrating generosity yourself, and by giving to others in moments when it is unexpected and not asked for. For instance, dropping by the neighbor's house with fresh-baked cookies or drawing a picture ahead of time to share with a playmate are both instances of sharing that do not conflict with your child's idea of fairness. No one is forcing the child to give up something he has in the moment; rather, he is sharing of his own volition, in his own way. Montessori education meets the giving mindset through lessons of Grace and Courtesy.Use the idea of turn-taking as a way to introduce sharing.*Discuss with your child the importance of taking turns, especially when in neutral territory. We all understand the fairness of letting another child use the monkey bars or waiting your turn in line at the drinking fountain. Use positive reinforcement when your child waits her turn, and when your child offers another child the space and time to use his turn.Choose wisely.Prepare your child in advance for play dates by allowing her to put away in advance anything she would like to remain private, or does not feel like sharing that day. If she would rather not share her brand new prized possession with her friend, that's okay, and you will probably help head off any conflicts around sharing it if you allow her to put it out of reach or sight beforehand. Similarly, if you are headed to the playground, allow your child to think about what toys he may want to bring, and what he may want to leave behind.Discuss, discuss, discuss.Make time to discuss how others may feel when we share with them, and how it feels to be shared with. Associate positive feelings with sharing! In addition to sharing/not sharing, we need to discuss how rotten it feels when someone grabs something we are working with. In this way, we can encourage empathy in our children and naturally discourage grabbiness. It is equally important to teach our children to be assertive when someone grabs something from them. Give children some words to use in these situations: for instance, "Excuse me, I was not finished with that. I'm happy to share it with you once I'm finished using it," may work in some instances.Step in when necessary; gently guide your child while in conflict.If two children are arguing about sharing an item, help them through the conflict, but only step in if the situation is escalating and it is clear that the problem is not going to be resolved without the help of an adult or mediator. Sometimes using "observing words" helps. For instance, saying "I see that both you and John would like a turn with the ball. What should we do?" can empower both children to come up with a solution together. "How about John has a turn for five minutes with the ball, then it will be your turn for five minutes?" Rest assured that while your young child may be hesitant to share at first, as he grows older, becomes socialized, and understands the give and take of friendship and social reciprocity, he will develop the skills necessary for sharing, and it will be much more meaningful and heartfelt if he experiences the freedom to make the choice on his own.*Starting in the Children's House, children as young as two years old are introduced to the idea of turn-taking; Montessori materials must be shared, as there is often only one "set" of something on a shelf. In this way, children learn to wait their turn for a work, and to choose something else in the meantime! 

Parenting: How Lessons in Grace & Courtesy Can Aid in Gentle Discipline

Montessori Practical Life lessons set the tone for expectations in the classroom, and even at home. When a child learns care of self, care of her environment, and control of movement, she learns self-discipline in the most basic ways, from a very young age. Learn more about the idea of discipline within the Montessori classroom, and how lessons in Grace and Courtesy work to help a child develop his will, below. During her many years in working with children, Dr. Montessori noted the interplay between freedom and discipline. Within the classroom, this refers to a child's ability to move freely and choose freely, within the limits or framework of the classroom, works, or lessons. Within the classroom, a child's inner discipline is practiced and refined through the environment and philosophy of Montessori; the child finds joy in his or her accomplishments rather than seeking outside approval from a teacher or other adult. As it relates to behavior, inner discipline takes a long time to develop, and is dependent on a child's natural development.A toddler, for instance, is first and foremost learning to control his body movements. Expecting and commanding him to sit still for long periods of time is unreasonable and at times, impossible for him to comprehend - not to mention, unhealthy for his development! The child under three years old will only "obey" an adult if the command directly corresponds with his vital urges (or instinct). Though this may sound bleak, it is nature's way of ensuring that a child experience and learn from the world for himself, including the positive and negative consequences of his choices.“Actually it is useless to depend upon scoldings and entreaties for the maintenance of discipline. These may at first give the illusion of being somewhat effective; but very soon, when real discipline makes its appearance, all this collapses as an illusion in the face of reality.” – The Discovery of the Child, Dr. Maria MontessoriThough it takes much longer to develop, inner discipline is a more effective, long-lasting and beneficial way of finding order and peace in a behavioral sense. It is through freedom that a child will develop such inner discipline. Ultimately, the question is not "How do I get my child to obey me?" but, "How can I help my child develop his will so that he will be able to obey?"This is where lessons of Grace and Courtesy come in! Grace and Courtesy (for instance, how to cover your mouth when you sneeze, how to pass in front of another child, how to knock on a door and wait for someone to open it, how to greet others, how to introduce someone, when to say please and when to say thank you) emphasize the personal dignity of the child and the respect of individual rights. Through work in Practical Life, a child learns to adapt to her new community. Care of the Environment is a wonderful introduction to community life and developing the inner discipline necessary for being part of a larger group.The Montessori philosophy's approach to discipline involves setting up a framework of acceptable behaviors through being consistent, adhering to clear boundaries, framing communication through positive words and by setting up the opportunity for making good choices while limiting the possibility for poor choices. For instance, if your toddler is suddenly obsessed with light switches and flicking them off and on, create boundaries while allowing him to listen to his inner guide by offering him the option to turn on the light switch when you enter the room instead of doing it yourself, then allow him to turn off the light switches at the end of the night. Having this special "job" will work to help your child develop his will while understanding that there is a time to turn on the lights, and a time to turn off the lights, and will work to satisfy his inner needs. Rest assured that this too shall pass; your child will not remain obsessed with the light switches forever!In addition to helping a child develop his inner discipline and being cognizant of his developmental needs, gentle discipline also involves building an emotional connection and trust with a child over time to guide him into making desirable choices. Putting empathy and respect at the center of the parenting relationship will aid in this process at home, while avoiding punishment (which does not mean avoiding discipline!) and especially avoids corporal punishment. Gentle discipline involves addressing skill deficits rather than punishing or shaming a child.For further reading, pick up a copy of The Discovery of the Child and The Absorbent Mind, both by Dr. Maria Montessori. For reading on gentle discipline from a parenting perspective, check out Gentle Discipline: Using Emotional Connection - Not Punishment - to Raise Confident, Capable Kids, by Sarah Ockwell-Smith

Language Games in Primary

One way that Montessori education differs from most other early education programs is its approach to language. There is no daily recitation of the ABC's, there is no alphabet chart posted on the wall for all to see and try to memorize. Instead, the Montessori approach to language follows concrete lessons and works that guide a child gently into the concepts of language. To aide in the acquisition of language, both spoken and written, there are many pre-alphabet activities that our Directresses engage your child in, and some that you can even do at home! Children's House Guide Reghan McAuley shares:"All young children experience sensitive periods in their first plane of development. The sensitive period for language begins at birth and go the whole way through the first plane of development (0-6 years). By the age of six, with almost no direct teaching, the child will have acquired a large vocabulary, basic sentence patterns and the inflections and accents of their cultural language. Maria Montessori believed that it was particularly important for adults to converse with children throughout this period, continually enriching their language and giving them every opportunity to learn new words. The Children’s House is a prepared environment that is intelligently designed to optimize the child’s experience and provides immeasurable gifts to feed the child’s great hunger for language."What can you do at home? Read, read, read and read some more. Beyond that? I recommend including a regular sprinkling of old fashion oral story telling, poetry, riddles, and songs. And don’t stop there! All young children are starving for language. You may also play language games. The best part about language games is that you can do them anywhere and practically anytime. These games can be perfect fillers while waiting in line, waiting at the doctor, waiting in a restaurant, waiting to get to Florida. They can be brilliant distractions when mending an injury, in rough transitions or simply a desperate need to change the subject."Matching GameThis early language game may not, at first glance, appear to have much to do with language. What could matching objects possibly have to do with language and reading? It's about the development of visual discrimination. For the earliest letter recognition, a primary-aged child needs to begin where she is developmentally: in the realm of the concrete. As she progresses, she will move from concrete to abstract. The matching game starts with the concrete, then moves to more abstract by changing the game; begin by matching objects to objects, then move to matching objects to pictures, then pictures to pictures, and eventually the child will be ready for sound game, then object box (seen below).I SpyYou are likely familiar with some form of the game "I Spy" - for countless numbers of us, it may be a go-to activity with our young children to pass the time in a car on a long trip, or in a restaurant while waiting to be seated. Here, "I Spy" is used to isolate the beginning sounds of words. For instance, "I spy, with my little eye, something that begins with 'cuh'" when referring to a cup. While this game is played within the classroom, this is one game that parents can do easily, with no materials, at home. Try walking around the neighborhood with your young child while playing this game, or if the weather is poor, just walk around inside your own home while playing! Be sure to use the phonetic sound of letters: for example, "buh" instead of "bee" for the letter B.Rhyming ChallengeA rhyming challenge is simple but has a big impact on a young child. Start with an easy-to-rhyme word, like hat, and count (or write down) every word you and your child can think of that rhymes with it. Try to top your list with new words.Vocabulary BuilderDr. Montessori stressed the importance of naming everything by its proper name. A bird, therefore, is more than a bird, it is a cardinal, or a blue jay, a robin, a pileated woodpecker, a mourning dove, a sparrow, a starling, and so on. Ask, "how many types of birds can we name?" to get started, or try flowers, trees, insects, fruits, vegetables, or colors!Create an Oral StoryStorytelling is a fantastic way to build your child's language and readiness for reading and writing, and is often overlooked. Before bedtime, or even at the dinner table, try starting with a story prompt and let each person add on to the story. Reghan shared one of her prompts: "A long time ago, there was a tiny man who lived inside a tremendously large tree in the forest..."Children's House Guide Heather Steinman agrees with Reghan; she also advises parents who want to help their child develop language to read, read and read some more to them! Heather shares, "It can be helpful to follow along the words you are reading with your finger and point to illustrations that coincide with what you have just read. It is also super important for children to see their parents reading. NOT on their phones or tablets but books, magazines and newspapers." Our children learn from observing us in our daily lives; if we make reading a priority, so will they!

On Independence: Allowing the Young Child to Dress Himself

If you are the parent of a Primary child (or were at some point in the recent past), you have likely noticed the abundance of creativity your child exhibits when getting dressed in the morning. From mismatched prints and two different socks to ill-fitting, sometimes inside out, backwards, or even upside-down articles of clothing - we've seen it all. Despite the hilariousness that sometimes ensues, this is a very important part of your child's day. Find out more below. 

This photo series is by Melinda Smith, of her youngest son Jacob

Beginning around the age of two (and sometimes as early as 18 months), a child will begin to dress himself. This, like many skills to master, can become a sort of obsession, presenting as willfully choosing his clothing, changing that clothing several times a day, and often becoming extremely frustrated or angry if anyone tries to interfere with that!From the Montessori perspective, this is a wonderful thing. From a parenting perspective, it can prove frustrating at times, especially in the morning when there is a time constraint, and many people in the same household may be trying to beat the clock. However, it is very important that we allow our children the time and space to dress themselves.Cab Yau, mother of three and Guide of Villa di Maria's Parent-Child course, says, "We must give our children opportunities to practice decision making, and dressing is such an easy way to do this. Dressing oneself allows not just for choice making (which is huge!) but it also offers the gift of independence - not only in choosing for oneself but the opportunity to fundamentally care for oneself."

Above: Cab's youngest daughter chose to wear a necklace as a headband to Primary one day

A young Primary child shows off the (backwards) shoes she put on all by herself

In the Children's House, winter coats are zipped up onto hangers every morning in the winter, even though this takes quite a bit of time for some children

We encourage parents of young children to allow them to dress themselves every day. And we promise, it gets easier! Below, a few tips on setting the stage.

1. Hang or fold clothing within reach your child's reach.A hanging closet rod can provide a temporary solution if the built-in rod is too high for your child. Or choose low open shelving for clothing to be easily seen and reached.
2. Rotate in appropriate clothing for the season.Keeping seasonally appropriate clothing available, while putting unseasonal clothing out of sight will avoid many power struggles in the morning. If the strapless dress or favorite pair of shorts are not available to put on during the winter months, your child will choose the long-sleeved dress or warm pants instead!
3. Allow extra time in the morning for self-dressing.We understand how hard it is to get out the door in the morning on time. And being on time is important! Wake your child up five or ten minutes early if getting dressed is taking longer than you'd like.
4. Avoid the temptation to hover.A child can feel rushed and judged if he is constantly watched while he is completing a task; this is the same inside the classroom and at home! Instead of standing over your child as she gets dressed, step out of the room after expectations are set. A simple, "It's time to get dressed - it's going to be very cold today!" before allowing your child to get dressed is a good prompt. Also, not being in the room will prevent your child from asking you for help or giving up on getting dressed, or prevent you from stepping in to help before your child really needs it.
5. Limit the amount of clothing.If a child has too many options, he can become overwhelmed easily. Also, it is quite difficult for him to maintain a neat and tidy closet or shelf if there are too many clothes.

While not necessary, consider a Montessori-inspired clothing rack (this may be a good option if you have multiple children). How cute is this one?

Holiday Gift Guide

The holiday season is upon us! We've rounded up a list of great gifts for children of all ages that support aspects of Montessori learning. Check it out, below!Opinel Le Petit Chef SetMade in France by Opinel, a French company that has been making knives since 1890, this sweet and practical set of essential cooking tools includes a stainless steel "Le Petit Chef" knife with a 10cm stainless steel blade with a rounded tip and a learning ring to help position and protect the fingers; a vegetable peeler with a stainless steel blade and a learning ring, and a finger guard to protect the hand while learning proper positioning.Children's ApronAn apron comes in handy not only for helping to cook and bake in the kitchen, but also for protecting your child's clothing when doing dishes or even painting! This one measures  22.25" long x 19" wide, is 100% cotton, and has a nice big pocket on the front.Montessori Gobbi MobileThe Gobbi Mobile is the third in the Visual Mobile Series following the Munari and Octahedron Mobiles. This one consists of five spheres. Colors of each sphere change very gradually. The size of each ball is around 1.46-1.5inches. This would be a lovely handmade gift for an expectant family. Read more about the infant Montessori home environment here.Touch Think Learn: ABCThis sturdy cardboard book gives little ones a touch-and-learn introduction to the alphabet with featuring die-cut letters embedded in mirrored cutouts.Grimm's Set of 5 Small Wooden Stacking and Nesting BowlsSuitable for children and toddlers age 1 year & up, these bowls are made in Germany from sustainably-harvested European alder wood and gently finished with safe non toxic water-based stains & food-safe oils (no varnish).  Each bowl is 1.5" in height. The largest bowl has a 4-inch diameter (10 cm). Young children will learn about size and sequencing as well as exercise their fine motor skills. They also come in rainbow colors! Molecules, by Theodore GrayYou may have seen Gray's other books, like Elements or Reactions, in the Lower and Upper Elementary classrooms. These books get lots of attention; they are full of stunning photography and can inspire children and adults alike. In Molecules, Gray begins with an explanation of how atoms bond to form molecules and compounds, as well as the difference between organic and inorganic chemistry, and goes on to explore the vast array of materials molecules can create, including: soaps and solvents; goops and oils; rocks and ores; ropes and fibers; and controversial compounds including asbestos, CFCs, and thimerosa.Small Tool Box SetThis small tool box includes a hammer, saw, Phillips head screwdriver, flat head screwdriver, ruler and pencil. It is a great way to introduce young children to (supervised) use of real tools. Pair it with this Woodworking with Children book (below).Into the Unknown: How Great Explorers Found Their Way by Land, Sea and Air, by Stuart Ross; illustrated by Stephen BiestyThis book is a wonderful gift for older children.  Discover how the greatest explorers in history — from Marco Polo to Neil Armstrong — plunged into the unknown and boldly pieced together the picture of the world we have today. Contains masterful cross sections, dramatic storytelling, and sidebars that highlight key concepts, places, and technology, immerse yourself in such expeditions as:—Leif Eriksson’s voyage to North America (eleventh century)—Zheng He’s travels from China to East Africa (fifteenth century)—Magellan’s circumnavigation of the globe (sixteenth century)—Tenzing Norgay’s and Edmund Hillary’s scaling of Mt. Everest(twentieth century)Birds of Prey PosterThis poster, measuring 14.25" x 20.5", contains beautiful illustrations with the English and Latin versions of each bird's name. It's great for identifying birds, or for budding artists learning to draw from nature. There are other versions as well, including Backyard Bugs, Herbs, Butterflies, Garden Birds, Tree Leaves, Wildflowers, and General Wildlife, among others.Spring LyreConsider a musical instrument for your child! The lyre is tuned to the pentatonic scale, which enables little fingers to walk the strings in any order and create a sound as sweet as a bird's song. This one, handmade in the USA, is made from one solid piece of cherry wood, and comes complete with an extra set of strings, turning wrench, felt accessory pouch, and a booklet that discusses the care and use of the lyre.Consider an ExperienceMany families may decide against buying more things for their children. Instead, consider gifting a trip, experience, or lesson to your child. Some ideas:School of Rock music lessonsFlying Trapeze lesson (you can do this with your child in the springtime!)Free Pass to a National Park for fourth graders through Every Kid in a Park: consider taking an off-season trip to beat the crowds!A Trip with a Parent or Grandparent: Take a day trip with just one child to a place you've never been before. You'll both enjoy a new city while spending time together.Season Passes: Give your child a season pass to one of the many wonderful museums around St. Louis, including the City Museum, The Magic House, or the Missouri Botanical Garden.Happy gifting!

An Easy Way to Teach Mindfulness

As Thanksgiving fast approaches, we wanted to share a bit about how to inspire the gratitude so commonly associated with the holiday - in particular, an easy way to practice mindfulness with your children (which is a great way to inspire gratitude). The answer, below. Ellen Langer, the social psychologist most famous for her unconventional studies on mindfulness and the language we use to describe our experiences and the meaning/ideas we attach to them was recently interviewed on On Being with Krista Tippett.  She suggests that mindfulness is achievable without the typical suggestions of meditation or yoga. Mindfulness, and ultimately gratitude, can be practiced through the simple act of "actively noticing things." How easy is that?!This Thanksgiving break, try to engage your children in this act of noticing. Be quiet and reflective, slow down, and enjoy the noticing! From there, we can draw attention to what we are grateful for, and encourage our children to do the same.

Development of the Will: The Emergence of Self-Discipline

Dr. Montessori viewed the assertion of will as crucial to a child's development. Will is the ability to demonstrate self-regulation, to control impulses, and ultimately to obtain the inner strength necessary to make the best decisions in any given circumstance. The development of the will is a stepping stone for a child to discover proper moral development as he or she becomes an adult, and is in constant practice within the Montessori classroom, from the Children's House all the way up through the Sixth-years. Below, Lower Elementary Guide Anna Schwind shares her thoughts on the will, as well as a few ways you can support your child's need to exert his or her will at home. We begin with a fantastic (and excruciating) example of a child exerting his will in an incredible effort to delay gratification; four-year-old Theo can choose to eat his candy (here, called a "sweetie") now, or wait ten minutes and have TWO candies! Ten minutes, especially to a four-year-old, is an eternity; yet, he does it! All of the ways in which Theo distracts himself over those ten minutes is interesting and entertaining: he sings, he chants, he kicks the legs of the table, he plays with the candy, he reminds himself through self-talk about the reward at the end, he changes his physical position several times, he even places the candy (still in its wrapper) into this mouth and takes it back out over and over again - and yet, he does not eat it!If you recognize this scenario, it's likely because of your familiarity with Walter Mischel's famous 1972 Stanford Marshmallow Experiment on delayed gratification. Years later, the study showed a positive correlation between children who were able to delay gratification by waiting for the second marshmallow, and general competence and higher SAT scores. Common sense tells us that learning to delay gratification is a good thing."Dr. Montessori would have framed the marshmallow test in relationship to the will. She thought that one of the most vital purposes of school should be to help children exert their will, and she recognized that the ability to exert will required constant practice. In The Advanced Montessori Method she wrote, 'Our little children are constructing their own wills when, by a process of self-education, they put in motion complex internal activities of comparison and judgment, and in this wise make their intellectual acquisition with order and clarity; this is a kind of ‘knowledge’ capable of preparing children to form their own decisions... they can then decide in every act of their daily life.'" explains Anna Schwind, Lower Elementary Guide at Villa di Maria.Anna goes on, "People often ask why there isn’t enough of every material for every child in a Montessori classroom, and while the reasons are numerous, one of them is to give the children opportunities to exert their will. It is a daily marshmallow test. They learn to wait until the material is available, to delay gratification, to practice patience. The mere act of choosing a material from what is available on the shelf is an exertion of the will: why hand washing instead of table washing? Why the large bead frame instead of the checkerboard? The children practice making choices, because choice is the outer reflection of the inner will. The will is akin to a muscle which can be strengthened with use. This is the vaunted character building aspect of Montessori education, the one that seems so elusive but is increasingly regarded by educators of all stripes as so critical to children’s development."The Montessori classroom, no matter what age or stage, is full of thoughtfully-created, conscious examples of situations and scenarios in which children may practice exerting their will. A Primary classroom encourages independent movement on the most basic level, from walking into the classroom on their own two legs, to hanging up their own coats, to choosing what work to begin with in the morning. Every movement encourages the control of the body through the exertion of the mind; the will is at work in the smallest and largest ways.So, you may wonder, what can be done at home to encourage a child to develop his will? Anna shares some basic and approachable tips, below."Your child’s will is not something to be suppressed, or subsumed by your own, or broken. Give them opportunities to exert it safely. Allow them, for example, to choose what the whole family will eat on a certain week night, perhaps from a set of acceptable options. Then give them a part of the meal preparation to be responsible for. Allow them to choose the movie you will watch or the game you will be playing together or the book you will be reading aloud to them or which of two parks they’d prefer to visit (again, feel free to limit their options).These activities have the side bonus of letting you get to know your child more deeply. What are their interests? What do they like? Your elementary child can easily make their own lunch every day (or perhaps the night before, if your mornings are too hectic). Would they prefer a hard-boiled egg or a cheese stick for their protein? Do they wish to prepare a quesadilla to include in their lunch?Lastly, I will tell you a secret about the will. People’s will goes further when they do not know it is exhaustible. Yes, I know, I just ruined willpower for all of you, now you know you can run out of it at any time. But keep your child safe from this knowledge for now. Do not tell them 'Oh I see you cannot make good choices because you are tired/cranky/hungry'. Expect them to make good choices always. Meet them with compassion when they don’t. Give them the nap/quiet unstructured time/snack they need without letting them know you’ve realized they’re at the end of their tether. And when their will is renewed and refreshed (because it always refreshes itself!) give them more opportunities to exert it."Thank you, Anna, for the idea and the input on this fascinating topic! “We must help the child to act for himself, will for himself, think for himself; this is the art of those who aspire to serve the spirit.” (Dr. Maria Montessori, Education for a New World)

Independence in the Primary Child: Why We Should Let Them Walk

For the young child, walking is a relatively new skill. Some of the children in the Children's House are only two years old, meaning they have only been walking for half their lives! For such children, walking in itself is a skill to acquire and practice: an enjoyable and necessary part of developing muscles, balance, self-construction, self-confidence, and above all else, independence - especially when it comes to walking into their classrooms each day. Below, read about why we encourage parents to allow their young children to walk from the car to their classroom every morning rather than carrying them, and how this can help build independence.It is so tempting to carry our young children in our arms. In our arms, they are close to our faces and hearts; there is comfort there. But when we are trying to encourage independence, it is important that we allow the young child walk into her classroom every morning. "We should bring awareness to the big and small ways we can encourage independence in our children," says Head of School Laura Ceretti-Michelman. When we set the expectation that our child will walk to the classroom door, carrying his or her own items, we empower the child to be independent and responsible, and he will rise to the occasion.If you are a parent to a Primary child here at Villa di Maria, you may have noticed that the Directresses never carry your child from his car seat into the classroom. There is a passivity to being carried around, passed from one set of adult arms into another set of adult arms, that we want to avoid. Instead, if your child needs help unbuckling himself in the car, do so, then encourage him with verbal prompts like "Don't forget your lunch box!" with a big smile and kiss good-bye.If you anticipate walking your child to her classroom in the morning, allow extra time so you won't feel rushed and tempted to sweep her up in your arms to save time. A child will feel much more empowered if she is allowed to carry her own personal items, by way of her own two feet. How grown up she will feel! It is important to allow a child of this age to control as much about her own circumstances as possible, especially as so much is not yet in her control.Talk with your child ahead of time about the expectations of walking to the classroom and being responsible for her own items, and we will set an example for him or her here at school!You may be amazed by the carryover from these small changes; a child who carries her own items will likely take on more responsibility at home, like learning to make her own lunch the night before school, doing her own laundry, doing her own dishes after dinner, and so much more.

The Importance of Sleep, + 5 Tips to Establishing Good Sleep Habits

Daylight Savings Time ends this Sunday, November 5th, at 2am; which makes it the perfect time to talk about sleep habits for children! Read about why good sleep habits are crucial for children and adults alike, and how to set up a good nighttime routine for your family, below. Sleep is the primary activity of the brain during early development; according to the National Sleep Foundation, by the time a child is two years old, he or she has likely spent more time asleep than awake! Sleep is especially important for children because it directly impacts their mental and physical development by restoring energy, increasing blood supply to muscles, repairing tissue and promoting growth, and releasing hormones crucial for healthy growth and development. Sleep has a profound effect on children's ability to learn, as well as the ability to retain memories. A team of German and Swiss researchers have shown that "material that children learn subconsciously during the day is transformed into active knowledge in their brains during long periods of deep sleep overnight," writes Tim Seldin, president of The Montessori Foundation, and author of How to Raise an Amazing Child The Montessori Way.For all ages, the brain organizes and stores memories, in addition to sifting through all the "noise" of the day during sleep. Sleep deprivation even in small amounts has been linked to many health and behavioral problems, including but not limited to heart disease, kidney disease, obesity, high blood pressure, ADHD, stroke, diabetes, depression, and mood swings. Sleep, and lack of it, impacts all areas of life, which is why it is so important to make sleep a priority for your entire family.How much sleep do children need? The National Sleep Foundation recommends the following:Toddlers 1 - 2 years            11 to 14 hoursPreschoolers 3 - 5 years     10 to 13 hoursSchool-aged 6 - 13 years    9 to 11 hoursTeenagers 14 - 17 years       8 to 10 hoursAlthough there is obviously some leeway in these guidelines, it is important to keep a sleep routine consistent. Below, 5 ways to make your child's sleep a priority.

1. Establish a Good Sleep Routine. Be consistent with your evening routine. It can look something like this: small bedtime snack, followed by a bath or shower, then getting on pajamas, brushing teeth, using the restroom, and reading a book or two. For older children, this could include time reading in bed before lights out. Doing this at the same time every evening sets up your child for success, and reduces the likelihood of tantrums and resistance to sleep.
2. Give 10 or 20 minute reminders before starting the bedtime routine. This will allow your child to mentally prepare for the routine, and to wrap up any activity he or she may be engaged in. If your child is engaged in a game, drawing, or activity with siblings, the 10 minute reminder can help her adjust to winding down. Remind your child that he can start up the activity right where he left off in the morning.
3. Limit screen time in the evenings. Screen time too close to bedtime has been shown to negatively impact sleep in a number of ways. First, it can cut into the time children would normally be preparing for bed and winding down, delaying the onset of sleep and overall decreasing the amount of sleep. Screen time too close to bed is also affected by the type of bright light screens emit, which interferes with a child's natural circadian rhythms by disrupting melatonin levels that naturally tell a child he is becoming sleepy.
4. Go to sleep and wake up at the same time, even on the weekends. Studies have shown that turning in at the same time every night actually produces better sleep overall. This kind of regularity can help you get to sleep faster, reduce overall stress, and protect against health and mood problems more than someone who shifts around his or her sleep schedule. This goes for children and adults!
5. Dim the lights an hour before turning in. This may be common sense, but bright light can interfere with the body's natural circadian rhythm. Try keeping the lights lower as it gets dark outside as a signal to your child's body that it will soon be time to sleep.

Don't forget to set your clocks back one hour before bed on Saturday night, and happy sleeping!

Why Your Child Falls Apart After School, And 5 Ways to Help

While I recently sat with a group of friends, all mothers with children ranging from 3 and 10 years old, I couldn't help but notice the similarities between all of our stories about the dreaded after-school slump. Regardless of the school - public, private, Montessori, language immersion - all of us had experienced the 3:30/4pm meltdown from our lovely offspring. Not even the ages of our children provided insight into what we were seeing, aside from the way the meltdown was expressed. Some form of "blowing off steam" or expression of disappointment, crying, whining, general feeling of being overwhelmed, or even epic tantrum (often after reports of a great day at school!) was inevitable almost as soon as they set foot in the car. The phenomenon is called "Restraint Collapse," and our Elementary Guides have been fielding many questions from parents about this topic. Why do our children melt down at the end of the school day? And what can we do to help them?First and foremost, a school day is full. It is full of physical, mental, emotional, and social stimulation - from the new lessons to the social conflict she may have with a friend, to presenting her best self to her classmates and guides. From a Montessori standpoint, this all has to do with a child's will (which we will completely cover in another blog post soon).A child, no matter what age, is usually well aware of the expectations of behavior and conduct within the classroom, and holding it together to remember those rules and self-regulate takes a tremendous amount of energy! Oftentimes when we pick up our children, they are not only physically exhausted, but they are mentally drained and very, very hungry!1. This brings us to the first thing we can do to help with this tricky time of day: provide a healthy snack. Something with protein that is low in sugar (such as some trail mix or nuts or a cheese stick, or apple slices with peanut butter) is an excellent choice, and can help restore some energy.2. If you have a car ride ahead of you, try putting on soft classical music or just keep the car quiet. This can be a time of decompression for your children. Keep in mind that some children, especially those who are more introverted, will not want to talk about how their day went (at least not right away). Try to respect her needs around this; give your child some time to just be quiet without the expectation of answering a million questions or making decisions about the rest of the day!3. Keep a few books in the car for your child to read or look at on the way home from school. This quiet time can prevent overstimulation and head off a few meltdowns before they happen. For little ones, consider a few audio books that have calm, soothing narrators. A few good ones we love are Sylvester and the Magic Pebble, Stone Soup, Little Bear's Visit,  The Little House, Tiki Tiki Tembo, Brave Irene, Owl Moon, Frog and Toad Audio Collection, and The Very Quiet Cricket (along with any Eric Carle audiobooks!) 4. Consider limiting after-school activities and playdates and instead save them for the weekend. Ask yourself if you are scheduling after school activities because your child really wants to do them and seems genuinely happy to participate, or because you are anxious about "keeping up." If it is the latter, you may want to reexamine your after school routine and make some changes.In a 2013 NY Times article, Polly Young-Eisendrath, a clinical psychologist and the author of “The Self-Esteem Trap,” argued that too many activities may be a problem: "Children really need that time to lie around, play more freely and have periods when they are side-by-side with their parents in the same room, being ‘alone together.’ ” The point is, be conscious of what is right for your child and try to meet him where he is.5. Respect a child's "down time" after school. You may be amazed by what your child chooses to do in her free time. One day, she may feel like burning a lot of energy being physically active, while another she may choose to calmly draw pictures for an hour before dinner time. Children with free time after school learn to further self-regulate and read their bodies' cues, tuning in to what she or he needs in the moment, whether it's more social interaction with siblings or neighbors, some alone time in his room with a book and some music, or feeding her creative need by practicing a musical instrument, helping to cook dinner in the kitchen, or chatting with Mom or Dad about her day.Of course, not everyone will be heading home straight after school; there are plenty of children who spend time in aftercare while both parents work. Here at Villa di Maria, we have a wonderful team that respects children's needs: there is snack, there are daily activities, but most of what they do is free play under the supervision of adults they adore.It is important to remember that the main reason your child may melt down after school is because they are secure; this has a lot to do with the safe space you as parents provide for them. Children who present their best selves all day long, then suddenly open the floodgates as soon as they walk into the family home feel safe to do so. They know you will still love them, and they may even know that you will help them manage these feelings and provide hugs, kisses, and kind words no matter how grumpy and irritable they are.

Modeling and Facilitating Conflict Resolution: What Parents Can Do at Home

During the first Elementary Parent Education Night here at Villa di Maria, Directresses Megan Eilers, Anna Schwind, and Rebecca Callander discussed "Conscious Social Growth of the Elementary Child," including the complex characteristics of the 2nd plane child. While an attempt to recap the fantastic, informative (and indisputably entertaining) evening would certainly fall short, an important take-away from the event was a discussion involving how parents can best support their 2nd plane children in conflict resolution at home. Below, we share several ideas on guiding your 2nd plane children (ages 6 - 12) through their conflicts with siblings, friends, and family members. Ideas were originally presented by the Directresses. The 2nd plane of development, often called the "birth of the social personality," takes place between the ages of 6 and 12, and can be fraught with conflict as a child develops her moral compass and a strong sense of justice; after all, working out a disagreement or injustice is difficult at any age, but especially when one does not yet have all the tools or language to do so. In both the classroom and at school, this can present as testing limits, tattling, learning to manage frustration and impulses, and plenty of peer (and sibling) conflict. It is crucial to keep in mind that all of these behaviors are developmentally appropriate and necessary. It is an opportunity that we, as guides and parents, should take full advantage of, especially as research has revealed the greatest job growth (including wages) to be linked with social skills like empathy, cooperation, and flexibility.Here at school, the Directresses and Assistants are constantly taking time to guide children through conflict. But what can we do as parents, at home?First and foremost, if you have a child (or children) in the 2nd plane, it is important to allow some space for conflict, but equally important to act as a "floater."  In other words, be aware of the conflict and remain close enough to intervene if needed. This attention does not simply refer to physical fights among siblings, but also to quarreling over what game to play, whose turn it is with a certain toy, etc.Letting siblings "work it out" on their own can backfire, as dysfunctional habits or roles may form quickly without the help of an adult to navigate the situation. For instance, if siblings experience the same scenario over and over again, a younger sibling may constantly give in to an older sibling, thus taking on a "doormat" role, or a younger sibling may learn he can get his way by crying or whining rather than effectively expressing himself with others. An older sibling may learn to manipulate or bully her younger sibling during conflicts, or vice versa! These habits can be hard to break and can last into adulthood, so they are quite important to address during this impressionable time.One way to avoid the solidification of bad conflict habits with your children is to step in and model conflict resolution. Allow each child to be heard, identify emotions with specific and concise language, and recap the conversation while working through the situation. Using precise language to articulate emotions is extremely important, and a tool your child can draw from and build upon over the years.Try to help your child stay in the current situation rather than generalizing. Redirect "always" and "never" statements by reframing the situation in your own words. For instance the complaint, "Jack never lets me have a turn with the ball!" can be rephrased as, "I can see that you are upset because during this game, Jack was taking a long turn with the ball. You seem frustrated that you have not yet had a turn with the ball."Key to conflict resolution during any age is to refrain from forcing an apology. Doing so can have negative results, including sending a message that "I'm sorry" is just a set of empty words one has to say in order to avoid delving any deeper into the conflict, or even devaluing the emotions and needs of the child who is accepting the apology. A forced apology does nothing to teach compassion or responsibility for one's actions. However, modeling and teaching active listening to our children during conflicts will naturally lead to genuine apologies - a conclusion our children will reach on their own, when they are ready, in addition to teaching them to voice their concerns and opinions in respectful ways in the future.For further reading, our Guides recommend the following resources for parents:On Peer Conflict, Villa di Maria's BlogBuilding Resilience in Children - 20 Practical, Powerful Strategies (Backed by Science), Hey Sigmund8 Ways to Help Your Child Deal with Mean Kids, Bergamo Schools BlogLives in the Balance, Ross Greene's website for collaborative problem solvingBooks:The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children, by Ross W. GreeneQueen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boys, and the New Realities of Girl World, by Rosalind WisemanAnd of course, please refer to Villa di Maria's Peace Policy, on our website, under Parents (scroll all the way down to the bottom of the "Home" page)

The Fort Builders

The Fort Builders use muscle and mental power, individual and communal strength; they make rules, break rules, argue, agree, build, and imagine. There is more involved than first meets the eye in building these forts - these spaces that children return to, build on to, and take pride in time and time again. Below, a fort tour, and what is going on developmentally. Why are children so obsessed with building forts? Read about this, and what do we do here at Villa di Maria to support them, below. If you are a parent of a child here at Villa di Maria, you have probably noticed the progression of several forts over the past month. One, which is located just next to the driveway and Magic Circle, is hard to miss, but the others are located in the beloved woods just north of the playing fields where Elementary students gather every day during recess. They return to these spaces over and over again, and work daily to add to their special places, sometimes planning inside the classroom for their additions.

Since this photo, the children have actually managed to complete the bridge!

According to David Sobel, author, researcher, and educator at Antioch University New England, fort-building is a universal drive that is rooted in children's healthy development. Amazingly, children all over the world create and build these special places: from the woods to the canyons, to deserts and riverbanks, inside hedges, among fields of snow, and of course, in back yards. “It used to just happen, and the best thing to do was mostly stay out of the way,” he told Paula Spencer Scott in an article about fort-building published in February, 2016. “Now the impulse is still there in kids, but opportunities to act on that impulse have diminished some.”Though this may be the case in general, here at Villa di Maria, we see the value in letting children be children, in being open to and supporting their natural developmental stages, including their urges to build forts. Instead of fighting against it, instead of creating rules to control it, we go along with it. As Ginni Sackett put so succinctly: "Ride the horse in the direction it is going." (Thank you, Reghan, for the quote!)We acknowledge how meaningful fort-building is to children. The youngest Primary children, who remain contained (for safety purposes) in a fenced-in playground, are provided with stumps and other loose-end materials with which to build.Once they are in Lower Elementary, children have a much wider range with which to roam, including portions of the woods found on the northeastern side of campus, just beyond the playing fields. Visit this special place, and you will find children ranging in age from 6 to 12, working together in small groups or pairs to build forts.Developmentally, children of this age feel so inclined to build forts for two main reasons: they are figuring out the world around them, and they are seeking more independence. More concretely, a fort is, well, a fortress. Such a structure is, "... literally and figuratively, a defense against all the forces of the outside world (and a primo place to daydream)," Paula Spencer Scott writes.There is so much thought, planning, work, and trial and error going on here. If you observe children building forts, you will see the choosing of a special place, the clearing out, the collecting of materials - the branches and sticks - the carrying, the transporting, the planning, the placing, the re-placing... it all takes time, energy, and lots of trial and error. Add in more friends, and it requires negotiation, compromise, and even conflict resolution.As with many things in childhood, the process is often the whole point. They may spend 95% of their time building the fort, and only 5% of the time actually playing in the fort!

There's plenty of pride that comes with finally finishing a fort!

What do we do to support children's fort-building here on campus? We give them space and freedom within limits. Staff station themselves in the woods, there are orange markers for boundaries, and "floaters" (staff who walk around during recess time) make sure children are staying within these boundaries. Other than that, children are pretty free to explore and build. There is also a good common sense rule to follow: do not build higher than two of yourself stacked one on top of the other! This does mean that smaller kids can't always go up into a bigger kid's fort, but it's generally safer this way.We also provide them with some natural building materials. When a large branch fell from one of our older trees the night before the first day of school (perfect timing!), staff asked that some of the stumps be left behind for children to use for forts and anything they can imagine. Usually these larger pieces of wood are used to outline boundaries of a fort or separate a space, but sometimes children build "stores," rooms, tables for crushing berries, or use them for obstacle courses.And of course, nature itself is the ultimate gift we allow our children access to every day. We are so thankful that, even through construction on campus last school year, tremendous care was taken to assure the favorite trees and spaces for forts were protected."When children come into contact with nature, they reveal their strength."  - Dr. Maria Montessori, The Discovery of the ChildAnd for further inspiration, check out this amazing 3-minute video about Jayson Fann as he weaves, bends, and shapes eucalyptus and willow branches into incredible human-sized nests. Thank you to VdM Assistant Cristina Kerr for sharing!

Beginning Soon: The Parent-Child Course!

Villa di Maria is thrilled to introduce a new 5-week course which will be available for parents and their young children, ages 8 weeks to 2 years, to connect, share, observe, and learn in a supportive, nurturing environment. Parents will learn, among other things, how to observe and respect their young child's natural development, when to intervene, the importance language plays in parenting very young children, and most of all, how to support a child in his or her self formation. It is also an introduction to Montessori and how to implement its principles within the home. More on the program, and how to sign up, below.Sessions will be led by Cab Yau, who has received her Assistants to Infancy certification, and also happens to be a compassionate, approachable, knowledgeable mother of three children here at Villa di Maria. Her goal is to welcome parents into an environment that is set up for their young child. The class provides both an opportunity to observe and interact with their child in a way that respects and celebrates their development, and how to support this development.Cab shares, "The child at this very young age is constructing herself.  She is learning, absorbing really, what it means to be a human being - how we move through space, how we communicate (both through language acquisition and the art of communicating), how we treat each other.  By providing an environment that is prepared specifically to support the child's development and more crucially by providing support and information for the parent we hope to support the child's self-construction, so that hers is a solid foundation upon which she can build."

"I want to help parents see how capable their child is and to give them some extra tools to use at home," Cab continues.

Registration starts soon, as the course will begin mid-October, but be sure to sign up soon as space is limited to 10 children and their accompanying caregivers. This course is not only available for parents of current VdM students, but also to the public; you do not have to be a Montessori family to join! Please contact Carrie Tallon, Director of Education (carriet@villadimaria.org) for more information.We hope to see you there!

On Climbing Trees

One thing you cannot help but notice when visiting Villa di Maria's campus is the abundance of trees of all shapes, sizes, ages, and stages. If you happen to arrive during recess time, you will likely spot at least one or two Lower or Upper Elementary children hanging from a branch, peeking up through the tree canopy, or even reading way up high in the cool shade. Why do we let our children climb trees? The answer, below.The most obvious benefit of tree-climbing is a physical one; children get a great amount of exercise pulling themselves up into branches. They learn about balance and spatial awareness. Also: bravery! Children who climb trees learn to take calculated risks. They inadvertently learn about gravity and calculating jumps (where they feel safe enough to jump versus what is too high and will result in that uncomfortable tingling when their feet hit the ground too hard).Studies show that taking small risks in childhood can result in a boost in confidence, self-assuredness, and resilience. Climbing trees is the perfect risk - especially when there are plenty of adults around campus to supervise! Though it is infrequent that an adult needs to tell a child to come down because he or she is not being safe.There is a noticeable calmness that comes over a child who has climbed to a desirable spot in a tree. The view is lovely from above. It is peaceful to be hidden amidst the leaves and branches - to feel the breeze, hear the rustling of leaves. A child's mind can open, his imagination run free. A child who climbs into a tree may seek solace there; in a tree, there is a quiet space, a little distance from others, and comfort in being close to nature. It's the perfect place to recharge.One of the main reasons we allow the children to climb trees: it's a source of play: “According to the emotion regulation theory, play is, among other things, the way that young mammals learn to control their fear and anger so they can encounter real-life dangers, and interact in close quarters with others, without succumbing to negative emotions,” states Peter Gray, in Risky Play: Why Children Love it and Need it. Children are naturally drawn to trees and the climbing and conquering of them because trees are nature's original jungle gyms and climbing structures!Dr. Gray goes on to say, “Over the past 60 years we have witnessed, in our culture, a continuous, gradual, but ultimately dramatic decline in children’s opportunities to play freely, without adult control, and especially in their opportunities to play in risky ways. Over the same 60 years we have also witnessed a continuous, gradual, but ultimately dramatic increase in all sorts of childhood mental disorders, especially emotional disorders.”And from Maria Montessori herself, who clearly valued nature and the inevitability of and importance of play and work for all living things: "... Does Nature make a difference between work and play or occupation and rest?  Watch the unending activity of the flowing stream or the growing tree.  See the breakers of the ocean, the unceasing movements of the earth, the planets, the sun and the stars.  All creation is life, movement, work.  What about our hearts, our lungs, our bloodstream which work continuously from birth till death?  Have they asked for some rest?  Not even during sleep are they inactive.  What about our mind which works without intermission while we are awake or asleep?" (Dr. Maria Montessori, What You Should Know About Your Child)It is the least we can do to provide our children with some of the best parts of childhood, here, at school.Trees, and green spaces in general, provide a sense of wonder within a child, and a connection with the natural world that cannot be replicated elsewhere.

Above: A Lower Elementary student builds up her strength and climbing abilities; in the background is the enormous branch that fell the night before school...

... which has provided ample learning opportunities for curious minds!

This child was fascinated by the woven patterns within the fragments of wood that had broken free of the large branch when it fell.

Though the Primary children do not have many opportunities to climb trees yet, they certainly will when they reach Lower Elementary. The Primary student above took advantage of Family Swim Night to climb one of his favorite trees, usually just out of reach beyond the playground fence, and was delighted to explore and challenge himself with his parents close-by!

Some general rules about allowing your children to climb trees:

1. Teach your child from an early age to choose nice thick branches on which to stand. Show him that if a branch is as thick as his arm, it's most likely strong enough to stand on. If it's thinner, he should not put his weight on it.
2. Refrain from lifting your child into trees; if he cannot get up alone, he most likely cannot get down alone, and it may be too high for his strength and/or ability. Also, a child who is in charge of his climbing generally will not go beyond his limits.
3. Teach your child to always have three points of contact on the tree (two hands, one foot; two feet, one hand, etc) to lesson the likelihood of falls.
4. Shove a book into a back pocket and enjoy the peace and quiet!

Happy climbing!

Montessori at Home: Lynne's Art Space

Montessori schools have such inviting, calm spaces, it's no wonder families seek to recreate a similar environment within their own homes. While home is home and home is not a classroom, there are a few things we can do to facilitate an orderly work space for our children within our home. Today, we share Primary Assistant Sophie Andre's beautiful, inspiring home Montessori space which she organized for her three-year-old daughter Lynne. Sophie originally shared this space on her blog, 琳 CHRONIQUES D’UNE GLOBE-TÊTEUSE on August 19th, and so generously agreed to let us share it here, with you, in addition to a short interview with Sophie about the space. Enjoy, and be sure to check out Sophie's blog, which is written in both French and English!Today I open the door of our new house to show you Lynne’s space dedicated to arts and crafts: the studio. Lynne shares this space with her dad who has his working desk here too (I agreed to let him a bit of space ! ;)). This room receives a lot of light through the day. Towards the end of the afternoon it is particularly enjoyable with the golden light coming through the big west window.This is where Lynne can play music, paint, draw, glue, tape, work with yarn or beads or other material… and read. I gathered all the books related to art and music (there are different reading corners throughout the house). I wanted to create a peaceful space, uncluttered and without too much visual distraction. So except for a mirror, our Chinese water painting of  fishes (that follows us everywhere), and some painting cards that I rotate, there is nothing on the walls.Lynne can freely access all the materials presented on the shelves : glue, tape, markers, pencils, scissors, different kinds of paper, stickers, paint, yarn, pompoms, pipe cleaners, beads… homemade play dough is stored in the fridge so Lynne needs to ask for it.The finished work (this is coming directly from what we do in our Montessori classroom) is put in a bin under the office supplies shelf. This is not very convenient but I did not find a better place for now. We go through this bin when it is full to select what Lynne wants to keep (I store it in the closet of her bedroom) and what can be recycled.There are two kinds of paint available : the regular washable paint used on the easel and the watercolor painting on a tray for more refined technique and different projects. In each case, we went though all steps that lead her to use this material independently. She has her apron on the side, towel and bucket (the bathroom is just beside). Obviously, I make sure to help with the cleaning if needed and remind her of some steps. I ordered on Amazon those no-spill paint cups. Very convenient to prevent accidents, and also to store paint.The craft shelf can present different activities depending on Lynne’s interest. Currently, we can see scrap papers, tracing lines and cutting worksheets, the watercolor painting tray, a basket of wood sticks, pipe cleaners, pompoms, googly eyes, beads and thread, yarn and pompom maker, gooey tiny balls (that look a bit like playdough) with a vinyl mat, and a basket of playdough ustensils with a vinyl mat.The music space, with different instruments: percussion, wind, xylophone, and the beautiful bells given to me by my uncle this summer, music books or books related to music, a rain stick, and matching cards of music instruments by Eltern vom mars.Villa di Maria: This space is so beautiful! What was your inspiration?Sophie Andre: There is a wonderful Montessori inspired mom community on social media. The writers of the blogs Our Montessori Life and How We Montessori are big references, but I am particularly fond of Eltern vom Mars. Anna takes amazing pictures and her settings are so inspiring, clean, white, peaceful. Our classrooms are obviously also good places to find inspiration for organization principles.VdM: How do you foresee Lynne's music and art space changing as she grows?SA: Good question.... I think she will be able to use this space for some years. The setting will probably stay the same as the room is not very big and Lynne shares it with her dad. Rather, the changes will concern what is available to her: the art supplies more varied, the craft material more complex, and asking more refined skills. There are so many art/craft activities to offer and then let her explore. I have a lot of art books waiting for her when she is bit older (museum gift shops are the best places in the world !). The music shelf is completed little by little when I find interesting instruments. Lynne loves music and dance; she likes to explore sounds. I still need to think and work on this shelf. The real music player is accessible to her on the living room, but she is not using it very much and I am not too happy with the setting right now... See, it is a perpetual thinking!VdM: What tips do you have for parents who want to convert a space in their home to make it more Montessori-friendly?SA: At first, I fed my imagination with my favorite blogs. Then I sat on the floor and looked. Imagined our own space... I spent a long long time daydreaming on the floor, at the level of my daughter's height. What would she see?  What would she like to use?  This can take days or months!

Arts and crafts can be messy. What is the level of freedom I am ready to give to my child ? Would I prefer her to do this or that specific activity outside or I am ready to let her do it inside?  What space would be the best for everyone's interest? Can I give a whole room or just a little shelf?  Is there enough light or do I need to add more?  Is the area available okay when spills occur (can I wash easily or is there carpet?) or I will be mad if my beautiful sheers are stained? What can my child handle?  What do I set aside for now?

I thought the key was just like in the classroom, to prepare the environment the best I can for my child to succeed and avoid big messes (and preserve the peace!). I wondered for each activity what would she need to complete the activity and clean up. If I let her freely use paint, she obviously needs a towel nearby, an apron, a pot to put dirty brushes, a vinyl protection for the floor, paper that's easy to access, a place to put the finished paint, a sink not too far... I cut some vinyl mats for the use of play dough or glue...

I am personally a huge fan of shelves for my daughter. I like the idea of one place for each thing. It helps to keep everything clean and accessible. Pots, bins, and desk organizers will help. I make sure pencils, markers, papers, and stickers are in good condition and attractive. Honestly, once the space is organized, it does not require me to take much time to check and straighten it. I try to erase any trace of pencils or marker (with my friend the magic eraser) to emphasize and help build the feeling of "Oh, this place looks nice and clean, let's try to keep it this way."

Our Swedish friend Ikea is a great place to find kid-friendly items. This is where I bought the desk and chair, the easel, some pencils. And once again, I keep thinking, sitting on my floor, observing my daughter, and I wonder, why she does not put her finished drawing in the basket where it should be? I observe, silly me, your basket is not convenient at all, too small, not accessible for a 3 year old... Ok let's try something else.

I make mistakes and I am learning too, every day, and my daughter is showing me the way if I take the time to watch her.

Wow, what a beautiful, well-organized Montessori home space! Thank you, Sophie, for sharing your thoughts and ideas with us. What an inspiration!

Good Books: This is How We Do It

An immensely important part of Montessori education is the concept of the child as a global citizen and his or her role as a larger community of peace. In Dr. Montessori's words: "This is education, understood as a help to life; an education from birth, which feeds a peaceful revolution and unites all in a common aim, attracting them as to a single centre. Mothers, fathers, politicians: all must combine in their respect and help for this delicate work of formation, which the little child carries on in the depth of a profound psychological mystery, under the tutelage of an inner guide. This is the bright new hope for mankind.” (The Absorbent Mind)While there are many wonderful books which encourage this mindset, we've found a new release that is worth checking out: Matt Lamothe's This is How We Do It. Lamothe follows one day in the lives of seven children from around the world - Peru, Uganda, Italy, Russia, Iran, India, and Japan - to highlight the beautiful differences and similarities between all children of the world.From how the children get to school (and even what each of their classrooms look like), to what they eat for breakfast, how they spell their names, how they play, eat, sleep, and spend time with their families, the book is beautifully illustrated and engaging for a wide range of ages.Indeed, very "Montessori" is how the different children help their families at home. This book also illustrates the Montessori values of respecting the wisdom of all cultures and the importance of the concept of positive peace, or the act of having values that are important to humanity such as justice and harmony. Diversity is a key aspect of positive peace in order to guide the world toward a place where these values are defended and promoted for people, regardless of (and in celebration of) individual differences.The final bonus: there are photographs of the real families in the back of the book!

Jam Buns: A Summer Baking Adventure

With summer in full swing, the students and staff at Villa di Maria are up to all sorts of adventures! We're peeking in on some of our families to see what they've been up to. Today, Upper Elementary Directress Rebecca Callander shares what her son Winston has been up to (hint: it involves sticky fingers and small victories).Rebecca is full of good ideas, like the violet jelly she encouraged her students to make earlier this spring! Her son Winston has clearly inherited the make-it gene. He came up with the idea for jam buns and planned, prepped, and executed most of the task on his own!He made good use of his family's raspberry-blackberry jam (homemade, of course).The recipe came from Julia Turshen's cookbook, Small Victories. Look at these beautiful photos from the book!

The book also includes many variations of the jam bun, including cinnamon rolls, garlic buns, herb-goat cheese buns, monkey bread, salami bread, or buttery dinner rolls. Are you hungry yet?

The finished product:

Amazing job, Winston! They look delicious!

You can listen to an interview with author Julia Turshen, who talks about taking some of the stress out of home cooking, here on NPR. Thank you, Rebecca and Winston, for sharing a piece of your summer with us!